My students are always trying to convince me to get a MySpace. “Why?” I ask. “So you can be COOL!” they explain. I keep telling them I don’t understand MySpace and I’m already plenty cool, but they just won’t give up. They are also apparently concerned about the fact that I live (or “stay,” in their parlance) with a cat and not a man.
Kids: You need to get a MySpace!That reminds me. . .I need to pick up some cat food on my way home.
Kids: So you can be cool!
Kid 1: And you can meet tons of guys!
Me: I don’t wanna meet tons of guys on the internet.
Kid 2: You just wanna be stayin’ with them cats all your life?
Kid 2: How many cats you got right now?
Me: Uh, one.
Kid 3: Well, 40 more years and you got a bunch more cats.
Me: Why do I need a MySpace anyway?
Kids: So we can send you messages and talk to you and stuff.
Me: I have a discussion board on my school webpage. Why don’t you (pronounced “wantchu”) hit me up there, yo?
Kids: It’s not the same!
Kid 3: We wanna be sendin’ you messages. Like, “Yo, what’re you doin’ on Saturday?”
Kid 2: And you be, “feedin’ my kittens.”